Men and emotions

Our emotional state often dictates how we behave. Men often feel they need to be self-reliant and provide for their loved ones, so it is not appropriate to express their emotions. Here MensLine Australia challenges that notion offering advice on how you can talk about your emotions openly and freely.

The four basic emotions

It is helpful to think in terms of four basic human emotions:

• Sadness
• Anger
• Happiness
• Fear.

Of these four emotions, happiness is considered the most acceptable in society. Yet anger, fear and sadness are universally felt by everyone. These emotions serve valuable purposes and are normal responses to threat and loss.

As emotions such as fear and sadness are generally not as accepted, men might try to hide these from themselves and those around them. They feel that they should be able to cope on their own.

Individuals might try to cope with ‘negative’ emotions in one or more of the following ways:

• Withdrawing from family and friends
• Working longer hours
• Spending more time away from home
• Consuming more alcohol
• Behaving recklessly and/or violently.

We might not always be able to identify what we’re feeling or have the words to describe our emotions. Men may feel uncomfortable talking to someone about them, leading to frustration in relationships when they cannot express their needs, fears and grief.